A Nigerian man and Twitter user @ayobankole is shaking the biggest table in Africa which is the ‘table of patriarchy’, as he recounted an experience in church today.
Read his tweet below and replies from some men;
So my Pastor just asked men in church: “If a man earns 150k in Lagos, & woman earns 750k in Kaduna, who should resign & relocate after marriage?”. Some men insisted the woman should relocate. Na patriarchy dey cause poverty for many men oo!
Imagine make person open him eye see poverty korokoro, & you use leg waka inside because of ego. I felt like slapping the man beside me that raised his hand in support of woman relocating. Oshi o da! Tscheeww
Ayeeee!!! What a sunday! Some men are legit in my mentions defending why the woman should resign because “it is a natural order for the man to give”. Ogun kill nature, Ogun kill order, Ogun kill giving. What is wrong with receiving??
From some men’s reactions to this tweet,I see a huge problem. Men think that it’s just being solely financially responsible in the home that earns a woman’s respect.They also think a wife earning more than them is a problem. Myopic thinking. This isn’t theory,I’ve seen it happen.
I know countless men that have left their jobs to relocate to meet their wives, because their wives had a better life. They eventually caught up, because they had the competence & intellectual acumen. Don’t stick your family in poverty cos of ego. It’s stupid.
A woman will default to you if she knows you are superior intellectually & emotionally, & more importantly, if she knows you are responsible and have her back. If your wife earns 5x more, it creates room for you to chase your dreams, & vice versa. Don’t be trapped in patriarchy.
What really matters is understanding, love, & your own capabilities & behavioural patterns as a man. All of these ofcourse should have been established before marrying. But always remember, it’s not only the money – you can have more money & wifey still disrespects you.